Permission. Respect. Love.
I was in chair massage marketing class on Wednesday. As we were getting ready for a warm-up exercise, one student walked up behind another, and paused.
“May I touch?” she asked.
“Of course,” student number two answered, without needing to glance back.
The first gently reached out and tucked the tag of her classmate’s scrubs back inside the neck, where it belonged.
We’ve been together for over a year. We’ve seen each other in our underwear. We’ve worked on each others’ butts. We’ve worked inside each others’ mouths. We’ve moved each others’ larynges to the side and worked on the muscles beneath. We’re nothing if we do not trust one another.
And yet. “May I touch?”
We seek permission. We respect. We remain sovereign over our own bodies.
It’s moments like this that make me love my classmates and my profession.
No assumptions. No violence. No shortcuts.
There are a thousand ways to ask, and asking is never wrong. How could this work we do not be a benefit to the world?
Related Posts:
4 Responses on Permission. Respect. Love.
Oooh, you get to do inside the mouth work? Technically, in New York, we’re not allowed to do that, which is a shame, because I hear its great for TMJ.
Also, on the touching/permission – I think that is wonderful. Its something I actually don’t see enough of at my school. I come from the BDSM community, where consent it key in all aspects of interactions, and no one touches with out asking, even if you’ve touched that person before. And personally, I’ve been sexually assaulted, and *really* don’t like being touched w/o knowing it will happen.
And while they do a good job of explaining the consent and ethics of touch in class, (The Ethics of Touch is actually one of our text books – very good, and you can get CEU’s for reading it and doing the questions, if you didn’t know about it) but some kids don’t get it yet.
Wendy, in Ohio we’re allowed to do intra-oral work for TMJ with a prescription from a physician, chiropractor, or dentist. Some folks specialize in it and work out of dentists’ offices, although it’s not common. I understand that, since it’s a case in which poorly done massasge can actually harm somebody.
Issues of consent also came to the forefront of my consciousness through situations of sexual assault. It’s an attitude that we really need to foster in the wider community through our smallest interactions. Some people don’t want to understand until it’s thrown in their faces.
Very nice post and a reminder for all to be considerate of others.
I found that when I was in massage school I became hyper aware of touch and needing permission to touch someone.
I didn’t do any in the mouth work in school in Florida either. I had to get that training in CEU classes after I graduated.
Leave a comment on Permission. Respect. Love.
RSS feed for comments on this post · TrackBack URI